So, I always say I have to get out more and try to get one of those social life things…My very best, and closest friend came down a couple of weekends ago, it was fabulous, I hadn’t seen her in ages! You know what else we hadn’t done in ages? Went out dancing! I love to go out dancing, and no, not for the drunken grinding on the dance floor with some stranger to try and find someone to go home with for the night. I mean, going out, with some friends, maybe a drink or two, and moving with the music (by myself for the most part). —I am really hoping that my Prince Charming, when I find him, likes to dance on occasion, I do love to do so.
We went out dancing at a local club, and in truth I don’t think I’ve been out dancing in almost a year (time flies when life happens). I tend to go out to pubs for live music these days, as opposed to a club.. Most pubs don’t have dance floors, I have been known to change that and make my own or just dance wherever I am when the music takes me (I’m fun like that). Anyhow, we went to this club, which was reasonably crowded, with loud music and a good number of people on the dance floor. My friend and I grabbed a couple of drinks and found a little corner of the dance floor to call our own. We are totally comfortable with just eachother’s company and really didn’t have any intention of seeking out others. Our “getting ready ritual” that evening totally reflected our comfort, as we pulled on jeans, a nice shirt, put on a bit of eyeliner and threw hair up in a messy bun (our “company seeking” primping ritual probably would’ve included hair curling, a dress, pumps, and perhaps the addition of eyeshadow and mascara).
Although it has to be said, that when myself and this particular friend go out, we always attract the most interesting people, lol. This evening was no different… We met a lovely lady that was there with a bunch of friends that didn’t like to dance, so she came over to us and inquired if she could join us. My friend and I being a friendly sort, of course welcomed her. We had a nice evening dancing with our new found friend. But we also encountered a lot of men this evening…
I guess my point of today’s post is almost a sort of rant, I’ve set the picture of the type of evening my friend and I wanted. We were content just dancing. And, you know what, if new friends approached, we are friendly and would converse, have a drink, and have fun. What I wasn’t prepared for, and moreso the point of my distaste; I don’t think I’ve ever been grabbed so much in my life!
If I go out and I see someone that I find attractive, and wish to strike up a conversation with; I will suavely go over (yes people still use the word suave, mainly me, although I wish it, I am anything but suave) and say “hello, how are you?” or “hi, would you like to dance?” (yes I do approach, I believe it totally ok for a woman to ask a man to dance). What I do not do, is lean in to say hello to a guy and grab a handful of his arse… When did this become socially acceptable?! Am I at a loss for social etiquette in the single life these days, perhaps? Or maybe it’s an age thing? Nine times out of ten, I find the men (or women, yes I observed ladies using the same intro) that attempt this brazen gesture are usually of an under 30 years of age bracket. (–perhaps a future topic as I’ve had some great conversations recently with different generations etiquette, mannerisms, etc.).
Fortunately any men (yes, unfortunately plural) that attempted this gesture that evening, ceased doing so when they were advised that I did not enjoy it. But I guess I’m just shocked that it was used by way of introduction. I was out to have a good time, and did not have time to educate these lads on manners, sadly…
Prince Charming will address me as a lady, engage me in interesting conversation, not grab, poke, or prod as if they were testing the firmness of a piece of meat. And though clubs are not ideal for chatting, you can dance with someone without grabbing at them, I’ve done it, it can happen 😉 Interest sparks, ask to talk to that person outside of the club environment sometime? It’s cool to ask for a phone number, right?
End rant… I guess I should thank the lads that attempted this, it probably shows their true intentions up front, then those of us on the receiving end of the grabbing can decide if that’s the type of interaction we’re looking for.